Saturday, 30 March 2019


بِسْمِ اللهِ الرَّحْمٰنِ الرَّحِيْمِ 
In the name of Allah, the most Gracious, the most Merciful

thanks pinterest!!

Assalamualaikum, hehe hai!! 🌱

Okay after being soc-med friends with Fila for almost 2 weeks (kalau jumpa ada lah cakap hi-bye gitu), we're finally meeting each other for the first time. Meet and talk for real lah. For sure, I was nervous like who doesn't duh when you are going to meet your crush omg!! Uhm so Fila told me he's gonna treat me this week so I was Ha okay insyaAllah and on wednesday around 10am macamtu dia ajak rehat (i was supposed to rehat at 10.30am tapi aku dah tukar awal-awal). Both of us (three actually sebab aku heret eyan sekali lols) jumpa dekat hospimart since kafe packed gila of course lah tak nak jumpa dekat situ ha ko gila ke hahaha orang lain nampak, mati aku!!

Before jumpa tu I bought something to eat la since aku tak nak lah harapkan dia belanja kan huhu. Segan aku. Masa jumpa tu tengok dia dah beli makanan and he was Ehh kan dah cakap tak payah beli hoho sorry lah. And guess what, we bought the same thing kot!! Hahahahaha dah lah banyak gila ya Allah srsly #ripdiet

Dah nak habis aku makan hahaha

Eyan ni pulak eyyyy bijak pergi tinggalkan aku kejap dengan Fila weh nervous nak mati tahu!! Macam biasa lah aku bukannya banyak sangat cakap, kalau diam tu ha biasalah 😂 ada lah aku tanya soalan sikit sikit. What happened on that day was he asked for my number phone in person siap bagi phone suruh type pulak tuh. Dia cakap that's the reason kenapa dia nak jumpa haritu. Padahal kalau orang lain boleh je minta masa dm kat insta tu kan. That's one thing yang buat aku macam 💘💘 the way he approached me and so on  ha gituww!! 

Lepas habis jumpa tu aku terus pandang eyan and cakap Comelnya dia!!! *sambil rasa nak nangis*  (muka aku sumpah merah gila weh pastu panas gila!!) hahahaha never in my dream I thought my crush would be asking for my number phone wey!!! Macam drama sangat tapi tulah I always always tell to myself jangan suka lebih-lebih because I might ended up hurting myself .

And of course since the first day we dm on instagram I oredi told my mom yang aku ada crush kat this boy. Masa kitorang jumpa tu pun aku kasitahu. Y'know what,,, she is super excited  over this thing tau ya Allah aku taktahu apa kena dengan mak aku hahahaha but the thing is he doesn't like me (that's what I thought la at least). Tapi aku happy gila la crush noticed aku hohoho

Till then xoxo

thanks blogger

بِسْمِ اللهِ الرَّحْمٰنِ الرَّحِيْمِ 
In the name of Allah, the most Gracious, the most Merciful

Assalamualaikum, hello.

Thank you blogger for your existence aih i love you so much!! 💜 after Allah, blogger is the best place to rant or tell stories or share my thoughts that I don't say out loud.  Thanks to my followers and blogger friends for making my days with all nice comments hiks may Allah bless you, beautiful souls 🙆🏻‍♀️

Tuesday, 26 March 2019

red or green light

بِسْمِ اللهِ الرَّحْمٰنِ الرَّحِيْمِ 

In the name of Allah, the most Gracious, the most Merciful

Assalamualaikum and hi buddies 💖

My mom suprisingly gives me a green light. As of she's opening me a door to adulthood (cewah!!). Some people support me from behind, and I thank you for that. 

Unfortunately, some people don't.

Just hoping you'll be on my side some days, cheering for me as you always be.

Till then xoxo

Saturday, 23 March 2019

don't crash too hard

بِسْمِ اللهِ الرَّحْمٰنِ الرَّحِيْمِ 
In the name of Allah, the most Gracious, the most Merciful

Don't fall too fast,
and don't crash too hard,
I tell myself.

birthday present wishlist

 بِسْمِ اللهِ الرَّحْمٰنِ الرَّح
In the name of Allah, the most Gracious, the most Merciful

Assalamualaikum, everyone 😊

Since my birthday is coming soon, I bet some of my friends are having a hard times untuk pilih hadiah apa yang aku suka. Diba, yat, nisa and yan pls take note eh 🤪

I don't ask for expensive gifts tau kalau korang nak bagi apa-apa pun aku terima ok hiks. Tapi here's my top 11 things yang ada dalam wishlist iolls (baca la ok)

1. Daily Wisdom: Selections from the Holy Quran by Abdur Raheem Kidwai (most wanted)
2. The Most Excellent Names of Allah by Abu Ahmed Farid (dah perati lama dah!! Belikan la kat dakwahbookstore hehe rm10 je gais)
3. Handsocks
4. New diary atau pen comel comel hahaha
5. Kasut kerja baru (dah mintak kat adik 😝)
6. Running shoe (hahahahaha supaya lagi semangat nak lari)
7. Telekung baru (?)
8. Any blouse yang cecantik di alu-alukan
9. Clinique Moisture Surge 72-Hour Auto Replenishing Hydrator
10. Haruharu Wonder Maqui Berry Antioxidant Cream (very pricey so, lemme beli sendiri tapi kalau ada orang bagi heheh i love you ok kidding 🤪)
11. Sandal or sneaker or heel baru untuk keluar jenjalan

Okay done! Jadi kengkawan toksah pening kepala ok nak fikir apa yang patut dibagi atau apa yang aku suka kuikui cuz I've listed it down here 😉

Ps:/ if you buy me any of those, I'll love you to thr moon and back ha gituwww 😝

Till then xoxo

therefore, we were one

بِسْمِ اللهِ الرَّحْمٰنِ الرَّحِيْمِ
In the name of Allah, the most Gracious, the most Merciful

Assalamualaikum, anyeong!

This will be the last blogpost related to Kpop and it will be about wanna one, just gonna make it short but meaningful.

Therefore, we were one - is the phrase they used during their last concert early this year. It was a sad ending for the temporary group and also to the wannables. I hated the phrase so much, it supposed to be Therefore, we are still one because it doesn't matter if their activities as a group still going on or they disband, those 11 guys would have a special place in my heart.

But 2 days ago, I was like, Aaaa now it makes sense hm at least to me. Indeed, therefore we were one 🙂 I'm leaving them behind, saying goodbye and waving my hands to them with bucket of tears. InsyaAllah, I was a wannable 🙂

Thanks for the past years and all the memories you gave me including albums, dvds, fancons and all official merchandises I had. I've sold some of it with cheaper price and some more are on the list.

These were some of my collections.


The inside

Innisfree lipbalm

Infinite DVD that I purchased in 2013

Seongwoo Summer Package

Premier fancon

Spent extra RM50 for ticket service


It is pretty

Headband I bought during the con

My collection

I had them in just a few months and I spent my money like water tahu tak Astaghfirullah habis duit rm1k++ sebab wanna one sahaja 😣 it was good lah masatu tapi srsly, keperitan duit tu memang terasa sangat!!! Separuh mati jugak rasa dia.

I've changed my whatsapp wallpaper, and about to change phone wallpaper, screensaver, laptop wallpaper and blog header soon insyaAllah.

Honestly, it feel weird changing to diff wallpaper after a year and a half, I guess

I'm wondering how would I take down all the posters in my room later on hmmm it's a bit sad but nah issokay, it will be okay.

How my room looks like

Still got some more on the other side of the room

Now goodbye, wanna one 🌱

Friday, 22 March 2019


بِسْمِ اللهِ الرَّحْمٰنِ الرَّحِيْمِ 
In the name of Allah, the most Gracious, the most Merciful

Assalamualaikum, hi world!

There are many things happened for the past few days, and I've got so much to tell. I've came to a decision where I decided to stop being a fangirl of K-pop. It's not easy macam Okay, jom stop minat Kpop liddat.

It was before subuh on Wednesday, I woke up and had sahoor. I didn't feel like going to bed after sahoor when suddenly, out of nowhere (well, it is obviously from Allah), I felt so sad, I felt lost, I felt empty and I felt I've been living in sin all my life. Then, I decided to pray solat taubat at that very moment. After solat, I cried for long looooooong time and this thought of putting a fullstop to Kpop just came to mind.

That was when I've unfollowed all Kpop idols on instagram, especially wanna one that one group I'd been cherishing for the past 2 years. Also, I've unsubscribed channels related to Kpop entertainment on youtube (still got lot to unsubscribe because it's so many!!).

This will be the biggest and hardest decision I've made so far after being a Kpop fan for almost 9 years :") thank you for making me happy and cheering me up for the past years, but sorry I would no longer be needing you from now on InsyaAllah, Amin!!!

This week (and maybe it will take a few more weeks, but o Allah please give me strength to get through this) was difficult for me, mentally and emotionally. I've been crying a lot day and night. It was challenging for me to not clicking to the photos and videos on my instagram explore when it is (still) full with Kpop. It was challenging to not listening to Kpop for 3 days when I was used to listen to it every hour. Bukan lah tak boleh langsung nak dengar lagu atau tengok drama, tapi aku kena kuatkan diri, kuatkan semangat betul betul, baru lah boleh sikit sikit. Kalau tak, mungkin kelaut.

The first person whom I shared this with is Nora, my roommate (ex- huhu) for 2 years. Sebab aku pilih Nora adalah dia kawan, dia lah manusia yang selalu ingatkan aku tentang agama, dia ajak aku buat benda baik, samada dia cakap direct atau aku follow bila tengok dia buat. And Alhamdulillah, she understand me more than other people do 🌿

Masih awal untuk aku kongsi pasal benda ni, tapi the only reason why I share it here is because I want all of you to pray for me supaya aku kuat, sentiasa bagi semangat dan ingatkan aku supaya to be on the right track kalau aku terbabas.

Moga Allah beri kekuatan, Amin!!

Till then xoxo

Wednesday, 20 March 2019

endure a lil bit more

بِسْمِ اللهِ الرَّحْمٰنِ الرَّحِيْمِ 
In the name of Allah, the most Gracious, the most Merciful

Gurll, you gotta endure this pain just two more days okay. Tahan sikit je lagi. Lepas ni dah tak nampak muka Fila dah sebab kau masuk inpatient pharmacy yang ibarat gua tu.

Penatnya suka kat orang.

Well, yes memang lah Fila approached aku tapi what if dia saja approach aku untuk berkawan biasa. Sedangkan aku ni yang dah lama suka dia letak harapan tinggi. Dan bila dia buat dunno, aku yang duk sakit sensorang.


Tak penat ke sakitkan diri sendiri?

Till then xoxo

Monday, 18 March 2019

jahat ke aku?

Salam, hi 💛

Something happened today: good and bad things.

Aku rasa macam jahat sangat!!!! Tapi dari dulu I always the one who give in 😔

I have no one to talk to about this and luckily I have Aliaa, yang bagi comfort words :") dah lama tak rasa tersentuh bila ada orang bagi ayat yang tenangkan kita. Tsk tsk.

Thank you Aliaa 🙆🏻‍♀️

Sunday, 17 March 2019

Allah bagi selipar baru


Hehe this will be quick blogpost on what happened last night ✨

Okay semalam aku pergi pasar malam kat menara condong as usual lah kan, sarung tshirt dengan palazo hitam, tudung fancy sikit pakai yang bercorak (haha) dan pakai selipar biasa. Ha yelah, nak pergi pasar malam je pun kan 😅

Tengah syok beli itu beli ini tetiba selipar putus weh hahahaha aku ingat cabut sikit jelah jadi aku masukkan la balik. Ala yang selipar biasa kat tengah tu ada lubang tu!!! Selipar beli kat kedai rm2 tu ha harap korang boleh imagine la kan. Bila dah pasang, ingatkan helok la boleh jalan hm baru sedua tiga langkah cabut balik. Terpaksa la berkaki ayam sekejap huhu.

Nisa ni kreatif & husband material tau (hebat bertukang etc) dia ambik jarum pin tudung and cucuk bagi getah tu tak terkeluar. Tak dapat nak tunjuk sebab aku dah buang selipar tu 😂 unfortunately, selipar aku dah barai terok jadi buat macamtu pun wasn't a big help pun :(

Nampaknya nak taknak kena la keluar duit beli selipar. Kalau korang nak tahu, dari awal praktikal sampai la dah 7 bulan ni, aku asyik duk cakap/berhasrat nak beli selipar baru tapi takde apa pun jadi. Asyik duk cakap takde duit, takde duit. Sebabnya? Duit aku dah disalurkan ke tempat lain: makan, duit sewa, bil phone tertunggak and refund customer yang ada lagi sikit nak settlekan.

Tapi this is what came into my mind tau semalam;
Dah lama aku nak beli selipar baru sebenarnya. Hehe akhirnya Allah bagi jugak selipar baru walaupun dengan cara macam ni. Memula berat jugak hati nak hulurkan duit kat peniaga selipar. Tapi segala rezeki and duit yang aku ada sampai harini semua Allah yang bagi, insyaAllah ada rezeki lain akan datang aaminn.

Aaa benda ni rare tau aku fikir sebab last time aku selalu terima this kind of thing and selalu redha dengan apa jadi was years ago masa aku memula berhijrah. Dulu selalu rasa dekat sangat dengan Allah, like I felt really close to Allah and can felt He is infront of me tau!!!! MasyaAllah satu perasaan yang best and tenang aku rindu sangat 😭

Hiks tu jelah a short story for today 💖 till then xoxo 🙆🏻‍♀️

Thursday, 14 March 2019

my reaction to my spm result


Hehe disebabkan harini result spm 2018 dah keluar, aku nak buat lil throwback on how i reacted to my spm result 🤪

Before I tell you my story, I want to congratulate to those yang ambik spm last year 🎊 whatever result you got, be thankful to Allah & be proud of yourself ok!

Okay, let's throwback to the day when I received my spm result 🕺🏻

Perasaan masa on the way pergi sekolah?
- ya Allah, berdebar tak terkata. Sampai rasa macam nak muntah sebab takut sangat.

Pergi dengan siapa?
- mama

Reaction masa dapat tahu keputusan spm 7A 2B?
- rasa sedih sangat sebab tak dapat bagi result yang baik dekat mama abah. Rasa macam tak berguna sebab habiskan duit mama abah dengan pergi tuition sampai 2 tempat. Rasa malu dengan kawan kawan.

Apa yang aku buat lepas dapat tahu keputusan?
- menangis tak henti selama seminggu. Tak nak keluar bilik, malas makan, tak bercakap dengan sesiapa even orang kat rumah. Setiap kali solat aku menangis & tanya Allah kenapa result aku macam itu macam ini. Lama jugak masa aku ambik untuk terima hakikat sebenar.

Apa yang aku lupa bila dapat result?

- bersyukur. Aku lupa untuk bersyukur sedangkan ada ramai lagi yang dapat keputusan lebih rendah dari aku padahal mereka punya usaha lebih banyak dari aku. Aku sepatutnya sedar ada hikmah kenapa Allah bagi aku keputusan yang macamtu. If not because of that result, I won't be able to meet the friends I have now at uitm, takkan dapat merasa sandang jawatan kat uni dan mungkin tak dapat jumpa orang-orang kat hospital aku praktikal sekarang (termasuk doktor dan jejaka-jejaka IT yang hensem hahaha). Allah takkan pernah kejam, ada sebab kenapa semua ni berlaku. Aku patut sedar tu dari dulu dan bukannya menangis macam it's the end of the world.
- aku lupa untuk berterima kasih pada cikgu-cikgu kat smk jalan empat (jess) & kawan kawan yang dah banyak tolong aku dari aku dapat C untuk chemistry sampailah aku dapat A 😭 aku langsung takde gambar dengan sesiapa masa hari keputusan spm dikeluarkan.
- aku lupa berterima kasih dekat mama abah yang dah hantar sekolah setiap pagi dari kajang ke bangi, kadang naik motor kadang naik kereta dan kadang naik lori. Aku dah banyak susahkan mama abah yang banyak hantar pergi tuition sini sana semata-mata nak tengok aku berjaya. Allah, berikan lah syurga Firdaus untuk mama dan abah.

Apa yang perlu dibuat bila dapat keputusan tak berapa hebat?
- bersyukur dan make a good choice on what you want to do with the result. Google bidang apa yang awak minat dan syarat kelayakan masuk bagi universiti yang awak inginkan. Macam aku, mak aku suruh ambik bidang farmasi haha makanya itulah sebab kenapa aku berada dalam program Diploma of Pharmacy kat uitm. Kalau awak minat engineering dan memenuhi syarat kelayakan, maka pilih la engineering dan pilih lah nak ambil bidang tu kat universiti pilihan awak. Tapi itu kalau awak nak ambik diploma la hehehe but if awak nak pendekkan lagi masa pengajian awak, pilih la samada masuk matrik atau asasi.

Matrik, asasi atau diploma?
- macam aku, aku tolak tawaran matrik sains kat kolej matrikulasi negeri sembilan sebab tak nak jadual padat & takut tak boleh go dengan masa setahun pengajian. Sebab kenapa bukan asasi adalah sebab dalam borang upu 4 teratas semua aku pilih asasi farmasi hahaha bila dapat 7A 2B tu aku tak layak la masuk program asasi farmasi. Keh keh. Jadi sebab tulah aku ambik diploma farmasi.

Best tak diploma?
- best! Sebab masa tak terlalu padat macam budak sekolah dan ada banyak lab sessions & assignments yang mostly memerlukan creativity macam shoot music video sedangkan ambik bidang farmasi ok haha lawak tapi fun! And also every week ada program and event 🎪

Apa yang kurang best tentang diploma?

- masa pengajian yang lama = 3 tahun diploma farmasi; 2 tahun kuliah dan 1 tahun hospital training

Hehehe I think that's all for now! InsyaAllah I'll update more about my course to help those yang berminat nak tahu 😊 if you have more ques, email me anytime 🌻

Till then xoxo

Sunday, 10 March 2019

i thought you forgot


Masih ingat post yang sebelumnya mengenai my guy best friends? The last story - my bestfriend dari 2012 sampai sekarang.

Ramai suruh biarkan aje dan hidup macam biasa. I did, walaupun masih sedih. Tapi hari khamis lepas aku ada upload chat dengan adik yang ada sebut 'esok aku balik' kat whatsapp.

Dia reply.

Allahu, menangis aku masatu. Aku betul-betul ingat dia takmau kawan dengan aku dah. Rasa sedih, rasa terharu semuanya ada. Extra emo sebab tengah pms (girls' problem haha).

Awwwww 😭😭😭😭

If I need to treasure one person from high school, apart from Farzana I'll definitely treasure this guy, Ammar :") orang yang tolong aku buat kerja kayu masa kemahiran hidup, orang yang aku ketuk hammer kat kuku, orang yang aku tumpahkan gam aduh rindunya masa form 2 😢

Terima kasih sebab tak lupa aku walaupun dah ada girlfriend huhuhu moga segala kebaikan menyertaimu insyaAllah, aamin.

Tu je nak update hihi Aida, if one day you almost forget this one friend, please remember he never forget you tau!!

Till then xoxo